If there are aliens out there scanning our world’s media reports, at this point I’m terribly afraid they think humans don’t now how to dispose of their waste properly — from public bike paths to parked cars, we’re just a mess. In yet another instance of presumably otherwise functioning adults, police say a woman did her bathroom business in a box of security tags at a Kmart store in Wisconsin. Sigh.
Authorities say the woman went to Kmart to return merchandise and in turn, left a nasty deposit for workers, reports the Smoking Gun.
Wearing a T-shirt with a picture of a dump truck and the phrase, “Dropping A Load,” as the police noted, the suspect elicited suspicion after workers smelled a “funky odor” coming from a cardboard box filled with store anti-theft security tags.
That led to the disgusting find of a urine leaking from the box, as well as feces. Police allege she slipped behind a cash register to do her bathroom business, as seen on store security footage.
After approaching the customer service desk to return some items, the complaint says she was shown on video walking to Aisle 1 where she “loosened her pants and squatted down” near the cash register, though store bathrooms were only about 50 feet away. A worker told police that the suspect is a regular customer, “so she should know where the public restrooms are located.”
A minute or so later, she’s “seen reaching for paper towels beneath the counter.” After finishing up, she approached the customer service desk again, completed her return and left the store.
Police used the return paperwork to identify the woman seen in the surveillance video, and confronted her at her home. She denied the dumping, though cops say she was wearing the same color shoes and pants as the perpetrator in the video, and showed police a jacket she was wearing in the store that also matched the jacket seen on the woman in the video.
She was charged with disorderly conduct and two counts of resisting or obstructing an officer. She’s also been ordered to have “no contact with victim store, Kmart” as part of her bond conditions.
Cops: Woman Pooped Inside Box At Kmart [The Smoking Gun]
by Mary Beth Quirk via Consumerist
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